Reflections Instead of Resolutions

Happy New Year 2019! A new year, a clean slate, new beginnings.

During the many years of raising children, September and back to school time seemed more like the beginning of the new year.  But it’s been many, many years since Mr. Smith and I have sent someone off to school with a new backpack and all the requisite school supplies.  Accordingly, January 1 has returned to its proper standing as the beginning of a new year.

I decided I would start 2019 off with reflections instead of resolutions. In past years, I have been excited to look at the new year and plan what I would like to happen and make resolutions that I thought would bring my plans to fruition. Unfortunately, resolutions are easy to make and often difficult to keep.  I am 63 years old and along the way the years have taught me that my “planning” is often in vain and life is filled with unplanned twists and turns. So today I’m reflecting on where I’ve been and what I would like 2019 to feel and look like.

There are two things I know will be happening this year.  First, my husband of 40 years will turn 65, a true milestone birthday.  At 65 you must admit that your life is more than half over and you need to think about what you want to do with your remaining years.  I have a friend whose counseling niche is death and dying.  She often reflects that when her patients are faced with the inevitable, not one of them has said they wished they had spent more time at work. What they wished for was more time with family and loved ones, more travel, more adventures. Happily, Mr. Smith and I have already started the discussion of what is truly important to us at this juncture in life and how we can make the rest of our lives reflect those values.

The second thing I know will be happening, is that we will be moving to another state for my husband’s job. We downsized many years ago, leaving the big old Victorian in northeast Indiana where we raised our three amazing sons. While we quickly acclimated to apartment/townhouse living, there are still many challenges to the changes. New doctors, dentists, banks, markets, shops, etc.  All life’s necessary details that must be taken care of. 

Years ago when I was struggling with our first big move and all the life changes that came with that, I started seeing a counselor. My biggest takeaway was her advice: You cannot make it perfect, but it’s your JOB to make it the best you can.  So I’m going to embrace the coming year with all its milestones and changes and get on with my job of making my life the best that I can.

C’est la vie…